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Reminder to sign petition

9/10/2013

Right now I have 111 signatures on my petition. That is great! But I need it to reach 200 in order to send it out. Well 200 is my goal. I would love to have many more than that. So please if you read my site and or blog, please take the time to sign my petition. Here is the link. Petition.

I get so sick to my stomach thinking about what is going on. I live my life and I deal with this situation, but when I take the time to slow down and think it just kills me. I know we will get through this. And so will you, but it is such a shame and a waste of good lives when people say stupid words and are punished for them for the rest of their lives. I know he is not a child predator, like many other men who said stupid things on the web. Why can't they see that? OOpps, they can, they just see the bonus money that they are getting for locking these men up!! $$$ in their eyes. I know this man, he is not a threat. Why do they not want to hear about the past lives of these men? They will say it is not relevant. No they do not want to hear it because then they would have to admit that these men do not have any characteristics or signs of being predators.

Ahh done venting for the moment!!

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Letters for justice

8/13/2013

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It has been quite a while since I wrote a blog post. I have been extremely busy but of course still working to try to change these crazy laws. My visits are on like an every other week or every three week schedule right now, I feel so wonderful when I get to see him. It really makes me happy. It is so sad that we have to walk separate ways, but one day he will be walking out with me!

I would like to thank those of you who so far have sent me their stories. I posted on my home page that I would like to collect as many letters as I can from as many loved ones as I can so I can get a package together. All our voices together will make more noise. I still do not have nearly enough, so if you have not yet sent me your story, please do so.

Remember to also include how this has affected the your life as well. What it means to society and how unfair it is compared to other laws. The more I get the better it will be.. I also stated that this must be a first time offence and that this was an isolated incident. Please read here for all details.

Bascially from the response I get regarding the internet stings, the men involved were on the internet in adult based sites, talking to adults at first and then the undercover bringing up the conversation of a minor. In lots of cases the men stated they were not interested, but yet they were still pushed. It was not the idea of the man, it was the idea of the woman.

Not one person who's story I read had any previous indications of interest in children. No child porn, no previous email contacts, no suggestions of pedophilia.

A majority of the men had some stressful incident going on in their lives where they were more vulnerable than usual, who were seeking attention or looking for something to compensate for their loneliness. These men were not looking to go after your children. They were looking to hook up with an adult. Yes they talked some crazy shi*, but that is what is was talk. Even if they went to meet, with no history of interest in children, how can law enforcement say that they really did not believe the person on the other end of the computer to be an adult playing games?

How is it that these laws are so much different then actual child abuse cases and murder? Anyone who really takes time to read these stories would see the truth. It is all about money and making law enforcement look good by putting all the men in prison. Men who were not stalking children!!

Visit after visit I have realized more and more that people make mistakes. People do need to go to prison when they do wrong, but the punishment needs to be fair. I have learned a lot about the way the system works. I always thought that we had this great legal system. People have no clue what is going on behind the scenes. The abuse of power, what these men have to endure. It is not right. It just really blows my mind.

I am going to try to start a support forum here on my website. To be honest, I am not sure how I will work it right now. I know that when I get it up and going I may need some people to help out and be administrators. People who can help answer questions and moderate. If you would be interested in that, please contact me.

The longer we wait to speak, the more men and families will be going through this. It does not look like they are stopping these stings. Or these entrapment's!! I pray for change now.

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Characteristic of a Sex Offender

3/22/2013

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I have spent a lot of time trying to figure this all out. I have been researching every aspect of sex offences and these types of cases because I need to be educated if I want to help him. I came across a law enforcement website which listed the "normal" characteristics of a sex offender. While every single person does not fit a specific profile, if they are allowed to arrest men caught in internet sting which occur in adult places then they should have to follow guidelines and use information that they have. Right? You would think.

Here is a list of characteristics of a sex offender from the law enforcement site.

Is most often an adult male.

Is usually married.

Works in a wide range of occupations, from unskilled laborer to corporate executive.

Relates better to children than adults.

Socializes with few adults unless they are pedophiles.

Usually prefers children in a specific age group.

Usually prefers either males or females, but may be bi-sexual.

May seek employment or volunteer with programs involving children of the age of his preference.

Pursues children for sexual purposes.

Frequently photographs or collects photographs of his victims, either dressed, nude, or in sexually explicit acts.

Collects child erotica and child-adult pornography.

May possess and furnish narcotics to his victims to lower their inhibitions.

Is usually intelligent enough to recognize that he has a personal problem and understand the severity of it.

May go to great lengths to conceal his illegal activity.

Often rationalizes his illicit activities, emphasizing his positive impact upon the victim and repressing feelings about the harm that he has done.

Often portrays the child as the aggressor. This usually occurs after the child realizes that by withholding "sexual favors" the child will obtain what he or she desires, such as new toys, clothing or trips.

Talks about children in the same manner as one would talk about an adult lover or spouse.

Often was a child molestation victim and frequently seeks out children at the age or stage of physical development at which he was molested.

Often seeks out publications and organizations that support his sexual beliefs and practices.

Usually corresponds with other pedophiles and exchanges child pornography and erotica as proof of involvement.

Is usually non-violent and has few problems with the law (pedophiles are frequently respected community members).
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So basically my BF has a couple of characteristics on this list. That being said those characteristics are as follows:

He is a male
He had a job
And he has never been arrested before

Hmmm.. Well lets see, that is like the characteristics of most people. Should it not be mandatory that they follow some type of guide lines before just arresting these men? They are not paying any attention at all to their list of characteristics. How is this fair? Oh I know, my BF has magical powers and is able to hide all of this predator characteristics He is amazingly able to fool everyone around him. Oh ya, and he was told because he did not have a Facebook account that was suspicious. Because everyone has a Facebook. Well I can name at least 10 people who I know closely who do not have a Facebook profile. Should they go to jail? But the other major things going on in his personal life are not relevant. Like working all day and taking care of family business at night. Like dealing with other life issues. UNREAL.

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Craigslist Internet Stings Florida - Are they legal?

3/20/2013

2 Comments

Here is our story. My boyfriend, who at the time when this happened was my ex boyfriend had been having a really hard year. He had a lot on his plate and for some time was in a state of depression though he did not know it at the time. His mother who he was very close with was diagnosed with Cancer. She was extremely sick and they were not sure if she was going to make it. He became her care giver taking her to doctor appointments, sitting next to her while she lay in a hospital bed and supporting her in every way he could. He was also having issues with a family member, a person who before he was quite close to. He had a close family member pass away and was also in an unhealthy relationship of his own. His life seemed to be falling apart.

He worked full time and when he was not tending to his mother he would just come home and go to sleep. He said he felt like doing nothing else. Stopped talking with friends, stopped going out, just wanted to be alone. He was totally out of character and depression can creep up on us without us even realizing it. Even if you know something is wrong, you figure it will get better but the truth is it may take you hitting rock bottom until you finally come to your senses.

So one night on his cell phone (because he did not have a computer) he decided to go onto the ADULT classified section of Craigslist to maybe find someone to talk to. To get some kind of release. He felt as though he was in a different world. He felt "numb" to the world. A release would be nice. He answered one of the ads and started to email back and forth with this women. At first the conversations were pretty normal. Later on they started to get sexual. Sexual in a bad way. The conversations turned into something you and I would never in a million years talk about. She introduced her child into the conversation. Him not thinking about it played along. Had the horrible conversations, said things that he thought this woman wanted to hear. I am not going to lie, he said some bad stuff. Immoral things. Things that now looking back he can't believe he said. But this is not who he was. He had no intent to go onto this adult classified section and pick up a kid. He was not preying on children. He was talking to what he thought was an adult. An adult with a wild imagination. And the consequences of this one wrong choice, this bad event has changed the rest of his life.

Was he wrong. Of course he was. Did he need some kind of psychological help. Yes we believe that he did. He was acting out of character. He was living in a make believe world. A world that he had never explored before and had never been in before. This man is NOT a child predator. I lived with him with a child of my own. I know him very well. You do not wake up one day and just become a predator. It does not work that way, but according to Florida law you do.

Because of some of the newer Sex Offender laws, internet crimes are treated differently than most other crimes. He had no intent to go onto the internet to find a child, but that did not matter. In other crimes your previous record and your life has a baring on your conviction. With this crime that does not matter. It made no difference that he has never been arrested, accused or has never been involved with a child in any shape or form previously. He is labeled a sex offender. And not just for the 6.5 years he will be serving in prison, but forever. He will have probation for 15 years and then have to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life.

I know that there are people who are going to read this and say, good he got what he deserves, but unless you know a person, unless you have dealt with depression in your life, you cannot judge. I am all for putting sex offenders in prison. I have other blogs that promote keeping our children safe, but this man is not a risk to children.

This is the only crime where double jeopardy is not illegal. And what I mean by that is that they are allowed to charge you with the same crime for each individual email conversation that you have with the undercover cop. So if you are speaking back and forth with the same person about the same thing 10 times, they can charge those 10 emails as separate charges.

If cops and under covers are allowed to go onto ADULT based websites and seek out lonely, depressed men who are looking for sex or a woman to talk to then they should have some sort of mandatory mental evaluation prior to locking these men up. They should be obligated to research their backgrounds fully. His phone was checked he had no child porn on his phone, he had no indications of being interested in child. Nothing but those conversations with that woman.

I will continue to share information that I have learned and share my experiences with you. He was on house arrest for 6 months and has been in prison now for 3 months. It is a hard adjustment but I am hopeful that others will share their experiences and have the government take a second look at these laws. Many states have banned these type of internet stings for the simple fact that they are considered entrapment. They are preying on men who in the real world are not interested in children. In another post I will go on to explain the risks of going in front of a jury or taking a plea. He opted for a plea and I will explain why.

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Help Change Unfair Sex Offender Laws

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Characteristic of a Sex Offender

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