So this past Saturday I got to visit again. Considering where we were, we had a really nice time. I loved that I got to hold his hand and look into his beautiful eyes. It kills me inside knowing that he should not be where he is. He is not the man they say he is. People make mistakes and at times are in need in help. He does not deserve to be locked up the way that he is. But I must say I am proud of how strong he is. He has a wonderful heart and I just pray that being in prison does not change that.

This time the wait to get in was much longer than last time. It was a surprise to everyone on line. I left my house at 6:30 in the morning, got there around 10:00 and did not get to see him until 12:30. Even though I wish I could have had more time, I am still very happy that I got to see him. 

Some days its not that bad for me. I just try to think that the day will come when I will be there waiting for him to walk through those doors a free man. Then other days I think about how many years it will be and about the fact the since all are categorized equally with sex crimes, he will have another 15 years of probation and a life time of registry, so he will actually never be free! I am hoping that something will change soon so that that will not be the case shortly.

Well we ate and talked and ate and talked some more. The hardest part of the visit is the goodbye. You walk one way he walks the other. I do not want to leave. I would sit in that room for days to be able to be close to him. Then I have four hours to drive home and think about it. Though I can't complain, at least I am free. He has to go back to his lonely world just thinking about how much it sucks that he can't be home with the ones who love him. 

I am having one of those sad moments right now. I wan't to hug him, hold him but I can't. But I need to be strong. I need to keep the faith. And I will continue to have hope for a loved one.


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